Why Team Zombie is Better than Team Unicorn
I need to know—am I the only person who picked up the Zombies v. Unicorns anthology and stood there IN THE BOOKSTORE, flipping through to see which authors were on my team? And yeah, I was pretty proud to be a part of Team Zombie. And I might have blown a raspberry to Team Unicorn. In the bookstore. ON THE BOOK. But I bought it afterwards, so that’s okay, not like the time I bit a book at one of my events and then forgot to buy it. That’s right. You could go to a bookstore and purchase my DNA and make a Frankensteinian monster out of it. I would be SO FLATTERED.
Yeah, lots of random caps today. I’ve had way too much caffeine.
But here’s the thing—I do not get Team Unicorn. Of course I went through my unicorn phase, when I was about seven, and a unicorn was like a horse with a bonus part! YAY BONUS! Anything horsey made me happy, until my parents finally caved and got me riding lessons, and I ended up riding Suzie, who was the temperamental horse that bit all the other horses, and then she nearly trampled me. And all I could think of was, “Thank god this horse didn’t have a horn to stab me too!”
Actually, that’s not true. I was really thinking a bunch of stuff I can’t say in public where kids might read it. It was pretty scary. But if I hadn’t been practicing my grown-up words, I totally would have thought that.
And the other thing about unicorns is that they make me feel inferior. I suspect I’ve never been pure enough to ride one, and even if I had, it probably would have tried to trample me. That’s why I prefer zombies. They’ll bite ANYBODY without discrimination. You don’t have to stand around worrying whether or not you have enough brains to be attractive to a member of the walking dead. And yes, they’ll trample you, but it’s not personal and they won’t try to bite your butt first.
Yeah, Suzie had some issues.
At the end of the day, I think unicorns come with a great deal of PRESSURE, whereas zombies just offer an opportunity to gleefully yell, “SHOOT IT IN THE HEAD!” without anybody looking at me funny. The zombie world is a world rife with opportunity to do things you’re not supposed to do. The unicorn world is full of white dresses you can’t get dirty and boys you can’t kiss because otherwise the unicorn won’t let you ride it. Zombies will let you ride them if you’re crazy enough to do it. They don’t even care what color your dress is, or if you’re wearing one, or if you’re still wearing pajamas at lunchtime. Not that I’m speaking from experience on that pajama thing. Really.
In short, go zombies! Go pajamas! No butt biting!
I think as far as cheers go, it might need a little work…
Published by: Delacorte Press
To Be Released on: November 13th, 2012
Series: Kate Grable #2
Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Goodreads
Senior year is positively hair-raising.
Kate Grable is geeked out to shadow the county medical examiner as part of her school’s pre-med program. Except when he’s arrested for murder, she’s left with the bodies. And when Kate’s brother Jonah stumbles upon a dead gamer girl, she realizes that the zombie epidemic she cured last fall was only the beginning of the weirdness taking over her town. Someone’s murdering kids—something really hairy. And strong. Possibly with claws.
Is it werewolf awesomeness like Jonah and his dorktastic friends think? Kate’s supposed to be a butt-kicking zombie killing genius...but if she can’t figure out who’s behind the freakish attacks, the victims—or what’s left of them—are going to keep piling up.
It’s scary. It’s twisted. It’s sick. It’s high school
Follow this tour here
a Rafflecopter giveaway